I once heard Cardinal Francis George of Chicago comment that we live in a schizophrenic age where sex is concerned. We promote ourselves as an open and tolerant society where the old Victorian rules that defined sexual propriety no longer apply, yet we are quick to point an accusatory finger at the peccadilloes of those in public, and even semi-public, life. On one hand the taste makers and purveyors of the "new morality" want to say anything goes, but when people actually act out on these revised mores the puritanical impulses in our cultural make-up come out in force, along with lawyers and publicists. To expand on the idea a bit, we, as a society, are in the midst of redefining marriage beyond recognition but then get upset when people treat the sacred bonds as something less then holy.
Yes, we live in a schizophrenic age, and we long ago lost our sexual moorings. In 1983 there was a scandal involving congressmen and improprieties with their teenaged pages, and they got off with a censure. One of them, Gerry Studds, insisted that this was his private life and the press could take a walk. He only admitted that he shouldn't have been involved with a staff member, but the age of his partner was no one's business since the lad was over 16, the age of consent in D.C. at that time. And you know, it worked. He was reelected six times after his censure until he retired in 1997. Am I the only one to see the irony in that?
If you haven't figured it out yet, this post has been prompted by the Anthony Weiner "sexting" scandal. That chastity and fidelity are too often casualties of political life should not shock us. This is not to excuse politicians who cheat on their spouses, much less abuse the help, but leaders as diverse as King David, Charlemagne and John F. Kennedy have found sexual continence a challenge. And no, I'm not one of those who says, "well it's their private life and has nothing to do with their ability to govern." David's infidelity influenced his military decisions and ended in murder. Many have questioned if JFK's escapades didn't indeed compromise his ability to govern, considering that at various times in his life he had paramours connected with Nazi Germany and the Mob. Adultery is destructive, and we should expect our leaders to be faithful to their commitments, both private and public, because they represent us. They represent the best, hopefully, of what we want to be as a people.
Beyond this there is something especially disturbing about the recent spate of scandals that we have witnessed in the last few years. These aren't simply powerful men with mistresses or unhappy women cheating on their husbands. These things have been happening for time immemorial. We're not talking about tragic love affairs or people in unhappy marriages falling in love with another, and fate is either keeping them apart or forcing them to keep their love a secret. Those are the stuff of epic poems and romantic legend. While we never condone sin, there is a humanity to some of those situations that draw our sympathy, even as we disapprove of the behavior. On the other hand the Anthony Weiner, Chris Lee and Tiger Woods scandals seem to have more to do with an arrested development than with star crossed love. While the public response does bare some of the strange, puritanical voyeurism that marks our age, I believe that deep down people know that these people are just plain weird and need to get a real life.
Yes, cheating happens, but what the three people I mentioned above have engaged in is simply adolescent foolishness. St. Augustine is famous for his struggles with chastity in his early life, but the days when his reputation was made were actually pretty short. When he was about 17 he found himself away from home, away from parental supervision and made a two or three year weekend out of it. By the time he was in his early twenties he was settled into a monogamous relationship that lasted thirteen years before his eventual conversion. Woods, Lee and Weiner either had more partners than the population of a small Third World Country, sent silly images of themselves to strangers or downright pornographic images to every female on his buddy list. And whats more they are between the ages of 35 and 47, well past the point where they could pull the youthful indiscretion card.
We not only live in a schizophrenic age but an adolescent age. Our collective sexual development seems to have been arrested and I see two main reasons for this: the glorification of youthfulness and the mainstreaming of pornography in the culture. As you can see I have my next two topics picked out already. Stay tuned.
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